The issue that I find myself facing every single day is time management. In order to be successful in completing our family goals, we need to prioritize. We have to decide where we will spend our time, and money, which family events we should or have to go to, which items do we deem a necessity and or need and which are just a want. Often our culture dictates precedence of certain family functions to attend and not attend. There are some events that are optional, and some that you wouldn’t dare miss simply because showing face, in our culture, actually goes a long way.
So the issue that I, and all other parents, is how much time should you spend with your family, and how much should you spend at work. Obviously if there is an opportunity to work longer hours to make more money, then by all means, stay at work longer, and make that money to provide for your family. Currently I’m out of class on our winter break in between semesters. This extra time out of school would allow me to spend more time at work, longer days delivering packages, therefore giving me a bigger check. However, with the extra time, I can’t help but get excited at the thought of a short work day, to rush home and see my wife and kids, and plan a fun filled day with activities at somewhere like Classic Skating, or Jungle Jim’s!
The responsible thing to do in my position would be to stay at work, actively look for opportunities to make more money at work, by picking up routes or stop for a longer day. The responsible thing to do would be to save as much money as possible right now, because when classes start, I’ll be working less so that I can rush to class staying at school longer to study which means less time all together with my kids. Those are what a responsible adult would do….I’ve never been very responsible, and I still do not consider myself an adult really, so I’ve decided to do things a little different:
This whole week I’ve been getting off early so that I can be home with my kids. I sit in my living room and wait as each child wakes up and runs from their bedrooms to the living room, screaming good morning to me! Kime is usually the first to wake up, followed by Lote, then baby Koti, and finally Teki as he is usually the last to go to bed. They all walk down the hallway rubbing their eyes, looking for something to eat. Each one is surprised to see me sitting there, as I usually go straight to school from work. These mornings with my kids, I cherish as I know the time is approaching fast, where they will be driving themselves to High School and leaving so abruptly from the house, they won’t even notice me sitting there waiting to greet them.
I’ve opted out of the responsible thing to do, make less money, and spend more time with my kids during this short two week break, because I think of them the entire day that I’m at school or stuck in the library studying. Often time while reading one of my books, a thought or memory of my kids doing something hilarious will pop into my head, and I’ll laugh out loud drawing awkward stares from fellow students in the library wondering what could be so funny in a biology book that would make an individual laugh out loud. It’s usually at those times that I call home just to hear my wife or children’s voices to hold me over til the end of the day. More often than not, the suspense of throwing my children up in the air or hearing their laughs is too much, and the thought of them, typically signals the end of my studies for the day, and jump in my car and rush home to see them.
Like I said, I’ve never been very responsible and I don’t really feel like an adult, and my decisions reflect that. I have less money, this holiday break then I should. I understand the statement “Starving Student” but my kids don’t ever have to know what that means. I love them all too much for them to ever know, these struggles we go through as parents, are all for them. And this, is the great debate.
Kime - you have a valuable op. to SPEND that time with your family so I commend you for that choice. You are responsible - the kids are healthy, happy and they are brilliant. Plus - your wife is a doll. Don't beat yourself up about it - I think that taking this time during the next two weeks is a good thing. When the semester starts, oy - it's game on then.
ReplyDeletei can't imagine missing out on all those varied moments of my children,...fathers really do make a great sacrifice in leaving the home to work,...it's really great to hear you write about something that most men are not vocal about,..if YOU think this way,..MAYBE my husband does too!! Kudos for seeing that responsibilty isn't always about making money,..it's about finding that balance!!
ReplyDeleteKime, you've got some mad skills with Literature my friend, straight up. You ever write Poetry before? Anyways, GREAT BLOG Brother. Ain't NOTHING but the TRUTH to the Great Debate you had just explained up above. A Job Well Done Brother. Till next time, keep up the Great Job and keep informing the World about the REAL QUALITY MEANING of FAMILY TIME with your Kids & Significant Other...'Ofa Atu Buddy!! (0:
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